-10 Thoughts To Consider
When it comes to happiness, there’s no one-size-fits-all answer. What makes one person happy might not have the same effect on another. So, does being in a relationship make you happier? It’s a complicated question, but here are 10 things to think about that might help you come to a conclusion.
1. Are you happy with yourself?
If you’re not happy with yourself, it’s unlikely that being in a relationship will magically fix that. In fact, it might even make things worse. If you’re not content with who you are, it’s important to work on that before getting into a relationship. Otherwise, you’ll just end up bringing your baggage into the relationship and taking your partner for granted.
2. Do you have realistic expectations?
No one is perfect, and no relationship is perfect. So, it’s important to have realistic expectations about what a relationship can and can’t do for you. If you’re expecting your partner to make you happy 24/7, you’re setting yourself up for disappointment. Putting your happiness in the hands of someone else is a recipe for disaster. However, being with someone else can foster healthy development together and separately if you both continue to work on yourselves while together. Realistically though, you need to pick the right person.
3. Are you looking to your partner to fill a void?
If you’re getting into a relationship because you’re lonely or you feel like you need someone in your life, it’s not likely to end well. A relationship should be an addition to your life, not a replacement for it. If you’re putting all your eggs in one basket, so to speak, you’re setting yourself up for disappointment. A void can never be filled by another person. Only you can do that. If you feel like a relationship is missing from you, then that might be different. Just make sure you check in with yourself, and that the void you feel is the person you desire, not the lack of love your not giving to yourself.
4. Are you looking for someone to complete you?
Similar to the point above, if you’re looking for someone to complete you, it’s not likely to end well. A relationship is about two whole people coming together, not two halves trying to make one whole. You should be complete before getting into a relationship, otherwise, you’re just going to end up using your partner as a crutch. Sometimes we need to lean on our partners when going through a rough time, this is natural and important to do during a relationship. However its not a good idea to start a relationship this way, the dependency can be crippling when your partner gets tired of holding you up.
5. Do you have trust issues?
If you have trust issues from previous relationships or experiences, it’s important to work on those before getting into a new relationship. Otherwise, you’re just setting yourself up for more heartache. Trust is an essential part of any relationship, if you don’t trust your partner due to your own issues and not their actions then being in a relationship wont make you happier.
6. Do you have commitment issues?
Again, if you have commitment issues from previous relationships or experiences, it’s important to work on those before getting into a new relationship. Commitment is an essential part of any relationship. Happiness will be like your relationships, fleeting and changing constantly, the instability will lead to depression and sadness mixed with the need for constant validation. A relationship can make you happier if you can find a way to be steady and consistent in one relationship. The personal development you will receive from dedication to another person can be life changing in the best way possible.
7. Are you ready for a relationship?
This might seem like a silly question, but it’s actually quite important. A lot of people jump into relationships without really considering whether or not they’re ready for one. If you’re not sure if you’re ready for a relationship, there’s no shame in that. It’s better to be honest with yourself and your potential partner than to jump into something you’re not ready for and end up hurting yourself and the other person. It is a hard question to ask, sometimes casual dating can give you some experience to determine whether or not being in a relationship will make you happier or not. The lifestyle of other people when they are around you can either stress you out, due to their need or it can make you feel happy. Experience will tell you.
8. Do you want the same things?
If you’re on different pages when it comes to major life goals, it’s going to be difficult to make a relationship work long-term. This doesn’t mean that you have to want exactly the same things, but it does mean that you should be on a similar path. For example, if one of you wants to get married and have kids while the other doesn’t, that’s probably going to cause some problems down the road. It’s important to be on the same page when it comes to major life goals, otherwise, neither of you will find the relationship fulfilling which leads to not being in a relationship that makes you happier.
9. Do you have compatible values?
Values are an important part of any relationship. If you and your partner don’t share the same values, it can be difficult to make things work long-term. This doesn’t mean that you have to agree on everything, but it does mean that you should be able to respect each other’s values and compromise when necessary.
10. Are you being realistic?
It’s important to be realistic when considering whether or not being in a relationship will make you happier. If you’re looking for something that doesn’t exist or setting your standards too high, you’re only setting yourself up for a constant search. It’s important to be honest with yourself about what you’re looking for and what you can realistically expect from a relationship. Otherwise, you’ll just end up being unhappy in the end.
-In conclusion, only you can decide whether or not being in a relationship will make you happier. It’s important to consider all of the factors involved before making a decision. If you’re not sure if you’re ready for a relationship, there’s no shame in that. It’s better to be honest with yourself and your potential partner than to jump into something you’re not ready for and end up hurting yourself and the other person. The feeling of not being ready should be strong, not a back and forth. If you keep going back and forth then there might be some deeper digging that you need to do. Seek more guidance, then create a calm environment for yourself, relax your mind and body, and make a decision.